Needless to say, we were extremely thorough in our planning, and thus made plans to ensure our regime is not undermined after all our hard work taking over the throne. Thus, we made a second plan of what to do in the event of a rebellion. Let’s just say, the first few steps are not fit for publishing, since they involve some excessive brutal torture. However, once we have quelled the rebellion, here is what will happen to the insurgents.
“They are moved to Antarctica. We will have to check up on them periodically to make sure they don’t hurt the penguins or reproduce.”
“Bring back the dodo bird.” [We had a very extensive conversation about this step, which also involved the Russian translation of “dodo,” which is apparently “idod.”]
“Make a really big throne, from which we can rule Bangkok and the rest of the world.” [Natasha demands one made out of diamonds. For Irvin, it just has to be comfortable.]
Like we said before, the world will be much happier once we’re in charge, full of happy people, happy penguins, happy dodo birds, and (of course) happy chinchillas.
Remember, insanity isn’t contagious…we think.
Happy Dodos (and Other Flightless Birds)
Taking Over the World
What surprises people about Irvin and Natasha is that we quite often have serious conversations about politics and stuff like that. We have since determined that the world would really be much better off if we were its supreme rulers (as Natasha prefers to call it, dictators, but that’s not a politically correct term). To that end, we wrote down a plan titled “World Domination in 22 Easy Steps” on July 9th, 2008.
For our security purposes, we obviously cannot disclose the full contents of this plan… but rest assured, you will know it when it takes effect. For now, you’ll have to be content knowing that it involves an army of hot pink chinchillas. Because, let’s face it, what army could stand against a writhing mass of bouncing hot pink fluff?
And here we had you thinking all along that our obsession with chinchillas was purely for our entertainment! Muahahahahaha!!!
Also, once we take over the world, Natasha insists on making the world capital “Bangkok.” This was probably chosen completely at random. ;)
We have divvied up the continents between the two of us, and are convinced that the world will be a better place under our regime.
Remember, insanity isn’t contagious…we think.
P.S. Once we take over the world (because our plan will definitely work!), all followers of this blog will enjoy a position of privilege in the new world order.